Pastor Butcher's Blog

It's a dance . . .

2010-04-07T12:38:00.004-04:00

Melissa Rumrill is a beautiful young daughter of God who is serving a prison sentence. It is amazing to watch and feel how her Abba Father is using an incredibly difficult experience to draw her close to Himself. Recently, she wrote me a letter and in the letter she paints a picture of her relationship with God that is so deep and powerful that I had to share it.

“Kevin, I’m so blessed in prison. I spend virtually all day in prayer, in the Word, being a witness for Christ. I am definitely learning how to live by the Spirit and keep in step with the Spirit. To truly keep in step – to me – is illustrated perfectly like this:

When I was a little girl, my dad took me to our town’s annual daddy-daughter dance around Valentine’s Day. I didn’t necessarily know how to dance, but I knew my dad did and he would show me how – I was so eager to learn! So when the very first song came on – usually a slow song – I’d put my little feet on top of his and I’d wrap my arms tightly around him and [because I was so short and tiny compared to him] I would tilt my head back and just gaze up at him in awe. I felt such an intense joy that I didn’t even notice when other people bumped into me – nothing could take my focus away from my father’s face. It was always really packed, so people would accidentally run into others – stepping on toes, knocking others out of rhythm, but not me – I could not be moved. People would bump us, but my dad had me wrapped up in his embrace so nothing could separate us. Nobody ever hut me by stepping on my toes because, as they rested on my father’s shoes, they were always protected, and no amount of commotion caused us to fall out of step with one another because essentially we were one – he was leading our steps. I recognized that I clearly could not be the leader, so I willingly trusted him to guide me, and even in the midst of the chaos on the dance floor, I loved my dad so much that I refused to take my eyes off of him. Although I’m a grown woman now, I’m learning to keep in step with the Spirit of God, my Heavenly Father. As a daughter of the King, I’m learning to stand on the solid rock of Christ, to keep my focus fixed and my gaze upward to heaven, to cling to the tree on which Jesus bore my sins [I Peter 2:24] and gave to me His righteousness, to walk in His ways so as to ensure that I will not be moved [Psalm 15].”

Thanks, Melissa. May we all, today, keep our eyes on our Father, who has us in His embrace and allows us to stand on His feet as we dance with Him through life.

Comparison

2010-03-17T10:05:00.000-04:00

Comparing ourselves with others doesn’t work. It makes us say, “He or she is blessed in this way or that way while I have been left out and am obviously not worthy of the same.” Comparing leads to resentment of our brother or sister and also resentment of God – who is the One who decided to bless our brother or sister in the first place.

This is so clear in the parable of the Prodigal Son in Luke 15 [and explained so well by Henri Nouwen in his, “Return of the Prodigal Son”.] When the younger brother comes home after his long, rebellious and scandalous journey…the Father welcomes him with the robe and ring of honor, sandals befitting a special son and kills the fatted calf reserved for the most special of occasions. The older brother sees the attention, sees the blessing and is jealous and resentful. He won’t allow himself to be happy for his brother’s repentance or renewed intimacy with his Father. All the older brother can see is the blessing on the younger son in comparison with what he feels has been his personal blessing from his Father. He is consumed by these thoughts of comparison.

“My Father plays favorites. My Father doesn’t love me as much as he does my brother. He has never killed a fatted calf for me. And in fact, my younger brother hasn’t lived the dutiful, obedient life I have lived. If anyone deserves special blessing, it is me! I’ve done all the right things – but my Father doesn’t even notice. It isn’t fair. Life isn’t fair. My Father isn’t fair. I hate my brother, I can’t be close to my Father – and until this changes, I am not going to have any joy in my life. I’m staying right here, outside the party, until someone gives me what I deserve.”

Sound familiar? You may not have gone this far in your thinking…but if you are living your life comparing yourself with others, you are on your way. Why not bow your knee before your Heavenly Father and ask Him first for forgiveness for doubting His love. Then ask for eyes to see that “all that He has is yours”. Finally, ask Him for courage to rejoice in His blessing of your brothers and sisters – and the sense to be thankful for His own unique blessing on your life. Oh, and please pray that I can do the same.

Shame

2010-03-03T14:01:00.003-05:00

In the 90’s, Atlantic Monthly devoted an entire issue to the subject of “shame”. They referred to shame as the most powerful and pervasive emotion “of our day”. Strong words. Here we are in 2010 and I would say that shame is still alive, well, pervasive and incredibly debilitating. Shame is the feeling, not that “I have done a wrong thing…but I AM a wrong thing.” Shame is present when we find ourselves listening to an inner voice of contempt that tells us we aren’t good enough, that we have never been good enough, that we never will be good enough…that no matter how hard we try, we will always be “different, less than, hopelessly deformed” in comparison with other human beings. We are not pretty enough, talented enough, smart enough…that practice as we might, we will always fall short of the standard of “normal”. Shame is not guilt. Guilt can be forgiven. The only antidote for shame is that we become non-existent.

Shame is so strong that it turns us into “egomaniacs with an inferiority complex.” Shame is all-encompassing. It penetrates every crevasse of our psyche and creates such deep emptiness and wound that all we can think about is ourselves…we have no fullness of spirit out of which to love anyone else. Shame is depressing. Shame is de-motivating. Shame makes us feel like crawling in a whole…and dying.

Is there an antidote for shame? Psalm 34:5 says, “They looked to Him and were radiant…and their faces were not ashamed.” If we will give ourselves permission to grieve our wounds and losses that began to speak the shame to us to begin with [we were NOT born with this shame!] – we will begin to hear ever so faintly a voice in the distance…calling us “the beloved.” This grieving takes time and it can feel like peeling the layers of an onion. The shame inducing losses that need to be grieved can be from our distant past [many of them are] – or from events and relationships and experiences in our every day lives in the present. [I have even felt “shame” after giving a talk on “shame”!!] But these losses must be grieved…eventually the circumstances or individuals who have hurt us must be forgiven…and ultimately we will be able to let go of the shame and amazingly…the voice of our Father will begin to clearly, sweetly, deeply call out to us His words of affirmation, affection, direction and love.

Henri Nouwen says it so clearly in “Return of the Prodigal Son”, “I cannot make myself loved…true freedom [from shame] I cannot fabricate for myself. That must be given to me. I am lost. I must be found and brought home by the Shepherd who goes out to find me.” Grieving, forgiving and letting go will not MAKE us feel loved. But by God’s grace, this process helps us create space for our Father to do His work of healing us and calling us to Himself, our true home. It is only there, in His arms, that we find true peace and relief from the shouting voices of shame that have shackled so many of us for so long.

May today be a day of grieving, forgiving and letting go…a day where we take significant steps toward our Father who is waiting for each of us with His arms of love. The Psalmist says, “Weeping endures for a night. Joy comes in the morning.” I pray that joy might begin to peek through the shame, today, for many who are reading this blog. Please pray for me as well, as I, too walk toward my Father’s outstretched hand and heart…leaving the shame behind.

My brothers and sisters with chronic illness

2010-02-25T21:29:00.002-05:00

Today, my mind and heart have been on those who battle long-term, debilitating pain and sickness. I have had a cold for a week. Granted, it is the worst cold I have had in 3 years. But it is just a cold. I know it won’t kill me. I know there are multiple over the counter remedies for every expression of viral misery in my body. And best of all, I know the pain will end [most colds last about 9 days – 3 days coming, 3 days here, 3 days going].

And I’ve gotta confess – even though it’s just a cold – I have whined my way through the first 7 of the 9 days. I simply haven’t felt good – and I’ve worn it on my sleeve more than once. In fact, I’ve apologized to Carla multiple times in the past week for my lousy attitude.

Which brings me to my friends who live with chronic illness. What about them? Some of them live with illnesses which may shorten their lives. For some of these illnesses, there is no drugstore symptomatic relief. And some of my friends know that until they cross over into eternity, they will battle their disease one moment at a time, day after day, for the rest of their lives.

All this to say – my stupid cold is tuning me into the greater pain of some of my friends. My heart is praying for each of them right now. I pray for strength. For patience. For healing. For symptomatic relief. For a sense of God’s presence. For a vision of their body being whole again. For the courage to face one moment at a time. For the guts to not shrink back and hide but to use the gifts they have been given for the good of others – as they are given strength to do so. For the hope and motivation that comes from trusting that our God is good and present even in what seems so monstrous and bad.

And I pray for the rock-solid foundational encouragement that comes from a deep sense of knowing “the end of the story” – that one day there will be no more tears or heartache or cancer or MS or fibromyalgia or Lou Gehrig’s or cystic fibrosis or paralysis or muscular dystrophy or mental illness or arthritis or amputations or autism…that one day our God will again make His home with us…and all will be new…all will be well.

And God, help me chill on the whining…and to use the gift of whatever health You give me – every moment of every day – for the sake of others and for the sake of Your Son, Jesus Christ and His Kingdom.

The Power of Blessing

2010-02-17T10:38:00.000-05:00

This past weekend I had the privilege of serving a group of about 500 jr and sr high students at a retreat center up in the mountains about two hours outside Denver. Several things blew me away about the time I spent with these precious kids. First, the pain. The pain. I’ve been around the block a few times and heard many, many stories of wound and hurt – but I was absolutely astounded at the level of pain in these young men and women. Almost every young person I talked to cried and wept and sobbed on my chest as I listened and held them and whispered the love of the Father into their ears. I’m sorry to say that much of the hurt came and continues to come from incredibly abusive or absolutely absent mothers and fathers. When will we get it as parents – that our kids need us to be present TO THEM, not the other way around! We can’t give away what we haven’t received – I know that – so it is up to us to seek our God to fill us up with HIS love [Eph. 3:19] so that we have something to give to our children!

One of the tenderest moments occurred the first night when I sat on the first row of the meeting room in front of a 17 year old young man – and prayed a blessing over him as if I were his father. I got very close to him, looked him right in the eye and told him how much I loved him and how he didn’t need to perform for me because he was my precious son. I told him that the day he was born was one of the greatest days of my life. [He told me later that he was adopted…so when I told him how much his “birth day” meant to me – he lowered his head and began to weep.] I told him that I prayed and hoped that he would continue to develop his character – because it was in his character that he became a true man. I told him I would be there for him as long as our God gave me breath…and that I loved him with all my heart. Then I took his head in my hands and blessed him, and kissed him, and embraced him. And even though I was not his real father and this was simply a role play – this young man melted in my arms – and there were students weeping all over the room.

The rest of the weekend, I had literally dozens of students come to me – and in one way or another – ask me for this same blessing…a blessing they longed to receive from their parents, but never had.

My Father, be with the young men and women I met in Colorado. Stay close to them. Whisper in their ear that you love them, that you are their Abba, that you will never leave them, never forsake them. Hold them close. Give them courage. Give them your guidance, your peace, and your blessing…in Jesus’ name, amen.

Having lost all…I have nothing to lose…

2010-02-10T12:07:00.002-05:00

Our men’s bible study is working through Henri Nouwen’s “Return of the Prodigal Son” – Nouwen’s very intimate and personal meditation on Jesus parable from Luke 15 – AND Rembrandt’s famous artistic expression of that same parable. I am in my 5th reading of the book – it is that profound. And today, a line hit me, touched me and moved me…a line I’m sure I’ve read at least 4 times before – but which for some reason found a deeper landing place in my spirit this morning.

This is the line: “The Father has nothing to lose because he has lost all. He has only to give. He can welcome his children home without asking them any questions and without wanting anything from them in return.”

Nouwen’s point is that though we all resemble, at one time or another, both the younger prodigal son as well as the older, resentful brother…God’s goal for us is to become Fathers and Mothers – who can welcome many sons and daughters home, to Him. The key to being an effective Father or Mother? To become one who “has nothing to lose because he has lost all.”

It is only then that we can truly be about giving to our spiritual children. Only then can we truly love our spiritual sons and daughters because true love is never about what we need, but the need of the other. We can only truly welcome home the spiritual kids God might bring to us if we have come to a point where we “want nothing from them in return”. Because this is the way the Father in Luke 15 welcomed home his prodigal son and this is the way our Heavenly Father has welcomed home each of us – without condition, without demand, without expectation, without any hoops to jump through, without any spiritual conditions to meet except that we have decided we want to come home.

He welcomes us freely. He welcomes us by grace. He is a Father who “having lost all, has nothing to lose.” That’s how I want to be…or shall I say, “become”. Father, help me today to continue to become a Father who welcomes home many sons and daughters…just like You. Help me to become a father who “having lost all, has nothing to lose, only to give.”

Surprised by joy

2010-01-28T10:06:00.003-05:00

Carla and I are in Denver at the Evangelical Covenant Pastor’s Conference. This morning something happened between us that sort of shocked…and deeply encouraged me. In a word, I found myself spontaneously caring, deeply caring, tearfully caring more about Carla – in that moment – than I cared about myself. Of course, this isn’t the first time I have cared about Carla [it better not have been, after 32 years of marriage!!]. But the unique feature is the setting – we’re at a pastor’s conference. I’m a pastor. This conference is about me. It’s about my stuff, my needs, my career, my training. And truth be told – it has always been so easy to make everything about me – because pastoring is about doing “God’s work, saving people, bringing His Kingdom to earth”…blah, blah, blah. It has always been so easy to think, “How does any other focus compare with that?”

And yet, this morning, I found myself overwhelmed with Carla’s needs, Carla’s wants, Carla’s hopes and Carla’s joys. Specifically, she has been able to spend time with Leigh Anne, our middle daughter, who is a student at Denver Theological Seminary. I have gotten to watch – during our times together this week, Carla and Leigh Anne enjoy each other so very, very much! There is nothing that gives Carla more joy these days, as an empty nester, than spending time with her girls. And this morning, as I watched Carla bounce around the hotel room, grinning, smiling, joking – almost giddy to be with Leigh Anne – I got tears in my eyes as I realized how much I love her…and how much joy I felt, anticipating WITH her, the time she would be having with our daughter. I took her in my arms, told her how beautiful she is, and then prayed for her – asking our Father to give her yet another good day – not a perfect day – but a satisfying, connecting, deepening and good day with Leigh Anne.

I will see both Carla and Leigh Anne this evening and get the privilege of once again “feeling” my wife’s deep joy and gratitude for her connection with one of her girls. And this night – I will also have a thankful awareness that our good God is still working with me and in me, to take me out of myself, beyond myself, in spite of myself, to authentically feel for and care about those closest to me.

This might seem small to some of you reading this blog today – but knowing the bondage of the trap of self-centeredness that I have wrestled with – for years – in my marriage – this day is huge…huge for me.

Deliverance

2010-01-22T10:45:00.002-05:00

The prophet Joel says, in the context of an “end times prophecy” – “Whoever calls on the name of the Lord shall be delivered…” [Joel 2:32]. Peter quotes this same word from Joel in his Pentecost sermon in Acts 2:21 – again, “Whoever calls on the name of the Lord shall be delivered…”. Then, Paul, in Romans, at the end of that great and powerful and mysterious section on Jew and Gentile coming together in the plan of God [Romans 9-11] – “…there is no distinction between Jew and Greek, for the same Lord over all is rich to all who call upon Him. For whoever calls upon the name of the Lord, shall be delivered.” [Romans 10:12-13]

Both yesterday and today, I have contemplated the power of these words. If they are not true, then they are ridiculous. But if they ARE true – then whoever I am – Jew or Greek or male or female or leper or thief or murderer or king or queen or prostitute or swindler or heterosexual or homosexual or Democrat or Republican or Communist or Socialist…and wherever I am – on a mountaintop or in a valley, secure or afraid, depressed or elated, sick or well, married or divorced or single, lonely or not so lonely, employed or unemployed, childless or with many children, money in the bank or destitute, sober or drunk or high…if I will simply call on the name of the Lord, I will be delivered!

Think about it – either it’s true, or it’s not true. It can’t be sort of true. Of course, I don’t get to say what “deliverance” looks like. And for me, therein lies the rub. I want to control my own destiny. I want to call on the name of the Lord and have Him deliver me according to MY definition of deliverance. That we do not get to do – or God would not be God. We would be God and could deliver our own darn selves. But if we are willing to trust that God is our Abba Father, that He knows all, that He is outside of history and sees the end from the beginning, that He loves us with an everlasting love and wants only the ultimate best for us…it seems to me that today, whoever we are and wherever we are and whatever state we find ourselves in – it would be a good thing to call on the name of the Lord. Then, as you go about your business, doing whatever it is you need to do to be obedient to Him – watch…and wait…for His deliverance. His deliverance will come…because He has promised.

Standing in the Gap

2010-01-20T11:20:00.000-05:00

Another one of our young men is in jail. He’s 14. He was picked up last night. He’s not a bad kid…in fact, he’s a good kid. He’s doing some stupid stuff. The enemy is trying to use the lure of drugs and money and relief from pain to lure him to his death. And I can’t stand it. I’m not sure what to do about it – but I can tell you one thing – I’m not conceding this young man’s life to the enemy. I’m not. As long as I have breath – I am going to cry out to my Father in heaven and ask Him to deliver us all – including my young brother in trouble. I’m going to beg Him to show me how to stand in the gap, to imitate Jesus and His care and even His sacrificial death – if need be – so that anyone, everyone can have a chance at life. Jesus showed me when He was on the earth that He cared about everyone, literally everyone. The woman at the Samaritan well who was an outcast because she had been married 5 times and was living with her 6th man, Jesus loved her personally, individually…she mattered. Zaccheus, who was hated by both the Romans and the Jews because he was a compromising tax-collector, Jesus went to his house…because he mattered. The nameless, capital criminal that was crucified next to Jesus…did you ever stop to realize that if he would have been the only man on earth that needed love and redemption – Jesus would have gone to the cross just to meet him, just to forgive him, just to be able to say, “Today…you will be with me in paradise!” Jesus shows me that I matter to God. Jesus shows me that this young man in Macomb County lockup matters to God. He loves us so much that each human life IS THE POINT. I will NOT let my little brother fall through the cracks. I can’t make choices for him…but I can pursue him…as long as God gives me breath…to show him that he is loved, that he matters, that there is another path to walk – a path that leads to life. God, show me the way. Show us the way. Show us how to pursue and love like your Son. And be with my young brother in the system today. Let him know You are there. Get him ready…to choose life.

The god of Self

2010-01-19T12:19:00.002-05:00

Oswald Chambers spoke to me this morning. His January 19th reflection in “My Utmost for His Highest” talks about Abraham right after God promises to make him a father of a great nation and that will in turn bless many nations [Genesis 15]. Abraham was old [86!] and childless – so at the very least, this was a promise from God that Abraham would have a son. Then the text says Abraham had a dream, “And great horror and darkness came upon him” [15:12]. And when Abraham woke up, Sarai came to Abraham with the whole “hey, why don’t you sleep with Hagar, my maidservant, because we don’t have any kids by me and if God is going to give us all these descendants, we’d better find another way to begin.” [Genesis 16] Abraham did sleep with Hagar, Ishmael was conceived and born – and the rest [as they say] is messy history.

Chambers says, “When God gives a vision, and darkness follows…wait.” Abraham got impatient. Of course, I understand why…GOD DIDN’T SPEAK TO ABRAHAM AGAIN FOR 13 YEARS AND SARAI, HIS WIFE, DIDN’T GET PREGNANT WITH THE SON GOD PROMISED UNTIL THAT TIME – AND ABRAHAM WAS 100 YEARS OLD [GENESIS 21]. But God had a plan, a program, a timetable – and it was not in Abraham’s best interest to try and circumvent that plan – in fact, it brought much pain to Abraham, Sarai, Hagar, Ishmael, Isaac – and the two nations that Ishmael and Isaac spawned. Chambers says, “God will make you in accordance with the vision He has given you if you will await His time. Never try and help God fulfill His word.” He goes on to say, “Abraham went through 13 years of silence, but in those years all self-sufficiency was destroyed…” God’s plan was not just to do something THROUGH Abraham…but IN Abraham.

I think the same is true for us. Chambers puts it like this: “The one thing for which we are all being disciplined is to know that God is real. As soon as God becomes real, other people become shadows.” He isn’t saying that other people become unimportant – but that their agenda for us [to find a more convenient way to help God accomplish His plan in our lives!!??] is put in its proper place – and we are free to simply wait on God and His timetable.

I found myself thinking about Psalm 31:14-15 – “But as for me, I trust in You, O Lord; I say, ‘You are my God’. My times are in Your hand…” Then I found myself bowing my heart before Him, asking Him to continue “destroying all self-sufficiency” in me. And of course, I asked Him if He could do it as painlessly as possible…

His Beloved

2010-01-13T11:03:00.000-05:00

I John 3:1 – some profound words from the apostle – “Behold…what manner of love the Father has bestowed on us, that we should be called children of God!!” What is on my mind this morning is how difficult it is for us to hear the Father saying to us, each day, “You are beloved My son…” or “You are My beloved daughter…”. Henri Nouwen, the Roman Catholic priest and psychologist used to say, “Being the beloved constitutes the core truth of our existence.” Yet there are so many strong and loud and abusive and “siren-like” voices that compete with the Father’s voice – shouting at us OTHER statements of identity – “You will never be enough” or “You idiot” or “You loser” or “You victim” or whatever. I am praying today – for all my brothers and sisters in Christ – and for those who are sons and daughters of God who just don’t know it yet – that all of us would be able to discern between the voice of the enemy who shames and accuses and abuses – and the voice of our kind Father – who calls us His beloved.

Quiet Moment

2010-01-08T10:25:00.000-05:00

Funny where a quiet moment with God can take you. I woke up in the pits. I began to pray – writing my prayer down in a journal as is my way in the morning. And I began to listen to U2 – and listened to a one of their songs – “You’ve got stuck in a moment and now you can’t get out of it” – and I thought, “that’s it, that’s where I am this morning.” Bono [I think it’s Bono – doesn’t he always sing lead in their songs?] – “You’ve got to get yourself together…you gotta stand up straight, carry your own weight, these tears are going nowhere, baby…” Then he sings, “You are such a fool to worry like you do…I know it’s tough and you can never get enough of what you don’t really need, now…” He continues, “And if the night runs over and if the day won’t last and if your way should falter – it’s just a moment…this time will pass.” And I felt like I had just heard Jesus in Matthew 6 say to me, “It’s ok, son. The Father will take care of your needs. And if you don’t have what you think you need, then you don’t need it yet – so let it go. Stop your worrying. Stand up, seek the Kingdom today – walk with me. It’s going to be ok. Funny, so funny where a quiet moment with God can take you.

One Man. One Life.

2010-01-07T11:34:00.006-05:00

I have been reading the letters of Franz Jagerstatter, a poor, uneducated Austrian farmer who was conscripted into the Nazi army shortly after Austria was annexed by Germany in 1938. He went to basic training, leaving his young wife Franzi and three little daughters behind. But as a follower of Jesus Christ, Franz became increasingly uncomfortable with what at that time was even the official position of the church – “fulfill your duty to the state – no matter what – God will not hold you responsible for their sins or errors”. An extra, added pressure from the church was the “high calling” of being a responsible father and husband. Franz was torn – you should see the pictures of his three darlings that Franzi sent him while he was in prison!! Of course, he didn’t want to see them left fatherless – and he loved his wife very much and you can tell from his letters to her that he hated every moment away from her.

But the more Franz found out about the true purposes of the Third Reich, and the more he read the New Testament and the teachings of Jesus, the more he realized that to go along with Hitler in any way, in any sense, was to deny His Master. So, after a leave, Franz was commanded to report for duty in February of 1943. The tide of the war had turned against Germany – and the official policy toward deserters or those refusing to serve – due to morale issues – also turned severe. At the most inopportune time, Franz, because of his love for Jesus, went to the official reporting office at Enns, and quietly refused to serve.

He was immediately imprisoned – and 5 months later, he was beheaded by the Nazis. Of course, the official report was that he was executed for his refusal to serve in the German army. What is clear, however, is that Franz Jagerstatter was martyred by the forces of darkness because of his passionate love for the Lord Jesus Christ.

The day before his execution, in his next to last letter to his wife Franzi, he writes: “How our final hours will be, we do not know. Nor do we know what struggles we must still pass through. That I have great trust in God’s compassion, that my dear Savior will not abandon me in the final hours – who has not abandoned me up until now – this you can believe with me.” He goes on to say, “The chief thing [for me] is only that the Lord not be ashamed of me…”.

One of his biographers says, “Franz Jagerstatter was a solitary witness. He died with no expectation that his sacrifice would make any difference to anyone.” And yet, as God’s sovereign will would have it, an American sociologist, Gordon Zahn, in the course of his research on the topic of German Catholics and Hitler’s Wars, “found a reference to an Austrian peasant who had paid with his life for refusing any part” in Hitler’s evil. He subsequently wrote FJ’s biography – “In Solitary Witness: The Life and Death of Franz Jagerstatter” – and to make a long story short – a Jesuit named Thomas Roberts – an Archbishop – took Franz’s story to the Second Vatican Council – and the rest, as they say, is history. Based largely on Jagerstatter’s example, the Roman Catholic Church decreed at the conclusion of the council, ostensibly changed their position on the responsibility of believers toward the state – calling sincere followers of Jesus to stand tall and firm against any crimes of state that condemn the innocent and defenseless!! This was a complete reversal of the stance the church had taken for centuries!!

One man. One life. He stood tall for Jesus Christ. I have found myself asking God to help me be more like Franz Jagerstatter. I have found myself – each morning in prayer – asking the Father to help me “follow the example of Franz Jagerstatter, even as He followed Jesus Christ.” I can’t wait to meet my brother Franz in eternity. One thing I know – when I approach to give him an embrace – I will have to make my way through and around the hugs and kisses of four women – Franz’s wife, and his three little girls.

Athletes in Action - amazing...

2009-02-13T17:55:00.003-05:00

Last weekend, I had the privilege of traveling to Xenia, Ohio – along with my brother and fellow pastor, Joe Herd – and sharing with a group of 350 athletes who had gathered at the Athletes in Action conference center in this mid-western town. These weren't just athletes - but young men and women who took the time and effort to meet one another - in fact, this retreat happens EVERY year - to discuss how they might grow closer to Jesus of Nazareth - and somehow impact the world in which they live.

And I gotta tell you - if this group of 18-25 year olds represents even a portion of the future of the church of Jesus in the world - I was impressed...and I am hopeful.

We began Friday evening by sharing the hard reality of the pain - the nightmare of the pain - in present-day culture and in the lives of the people we live with. In some ways, it seems at times like the enemy is winning. We talked about what is NOT working to heal that pain - politics, education, money - even the church with our conventional "programs" that much of culture seems to ignore...and we spoke of the words and example of Jesus, who said on the night before He was crucified, "If you will love one another, as I have loved you...all will know that you are My followers...". [John 13:34-35] Of course, Jesus left us picture after picture, story after story of what that love looks like when we live it out - basically it boils down to touching lepers and washing the feet of lepers...as we, too, have been touched by Him in our leprous selves.

Saturday morning we suggested that everywhere this precious love of Jesus has been lived out – no matter what the cost – the Kingdom of God has come. [Note the growth of the early church, in the powerful and diabolical Roman Empire, from 10 thousand to 15 million in 200 years, armed only with the love of Jesus Christ and precious little else.] But we also noted that Jesus said we could only love others “as I have loved you.” In other words, this kind of love is impossible to give…if we haven’t first received it ourselves.

So we talked about why some of us don’t really know or feel the love of God personally and how our experiences growing up and other wounds in our life can create a vacuum in our spirit that literally cries out to be filled. We can’t love others – because the emptiness causes us to be all about ourselves. And we try and try to fill the vacuum with everything under the sun – but we finally get to the place where we realize that only the love of Jesus Christ will “fill us with all the fullness of God” [Ephesians 3:19]. We also talked about beginning to grieve the losses that created the vacuum in the first place – and then learning to forgive…and finally let go – and how wonderful it is to realize that the shaming voices that have literally controlled our lives are starting to fade and we are beginning to hear the voice of our God calling us His beloved sons and daughters.

On Saturday afternoon – we worked at applying His love to our gender, and the fact that God’s plan involves us forming male and female partnerships in order to bring the dominion of His Kingdom to the earth [Genesis 1:28]. But how can we form these partnerships if we don’t even know what it means to be created male and female – in God’s image – in the first place? A panel of incredible men and women helped us wrestle with what these partnerships might look like – and how to de-sexualize them and learn to live authentically with one another as brothers and sisters in Jesus Christ – with our particular gifts of relationship and beauty and strength and courage complementing each other in the battle with our enemy for control of the earth.

Finally, Sunday morning, my brother Joe Herd and I tried to apply the love of Jesus Christ to one more area – the area of ethnicity and race. We tried to show how the church was never intended to be a “club or guild” – with everyone looking and talking and acting alike – but “a whole new version of the human race” [N.T. Wright]. The church – this incredible, multifaceted diamond of humanity, all brought together through the death of Jesus and unified only IN Jesus – was intended to be a miraculous, first sign that Jesus was the true King and that His Kingdom was beginning to break through into the world. Joe [who happens to be black] and I [who happen to be white] admitted that we weren’t sure how “racial reconciliation” was supposed to work and that our experience of trying to “dismantle” the complex, satanic web of 300 years of racism in America had led both of us to deep frustration and sometimes despair. But the conclusion we BOTH had come to was that [once again] the love of Jesus Christ was strong enough and enduring enough to draw us together, and that we [Joe and Kevin] loved each other and were willing to die for one another and that maybe, just maybe, THIS LOVE OF JESUS is the answer for bringing all of us together today…which was Jesus’ intent for the church in the first place.

In and around the weekend, Joe and I had the privilege of dialoguing with student after student. We laughed together and cried together and shared our hearts together. I looked into the eyes of some of the most sincere young men and young women I have met on the planet – and felt their authenticity and their passion to grow and to heal and to love and be loved in the name of Jesus Christ. I was deeply touched and deeply moved by each of them and each personal story of both struggle and victory. In fact, I can’t get the faces out of my mind…I can’t stop thinking of the stories and the pain and the passion and the desire. I will never be the same after being with this group of young people – and can say, with Joe, that we love them with the love of Christ and are with them all the way home.

And one final note – the staff. I had the privilege of meeting with some of the finest leaders in the body of Jesus Christ – AIA staff from universities all over the United States – who love these student athletes with the deepest parts of their heart and soul. And I promise you they are not in it for the money because they don’t make much money and they aren’t in it for the fame because most of the time no one knows they exist except the students they love…and some of them serve the students while trying to raise families and nurture marriages and all of them serve the students while managing their own relationships and walk with Jesus Christ and their own baggage and issues and doubts and fears and dreams. And I just want to say to these staff – I love you – we love you – and we are with you, too, all the way home and want to serve you and support you and have your back in your calling to nurture the student athletes of our Division I schools. Peace to you, brothers and sisters, and thanks for welcoming Joe and I into your midst. We will never, ever be the same…and we will never, ever forget.

Jesus and South Africa and people

2009-01-27T11:03:00.006-05:00

It has been awhile since I have written - but trips to South America in November and South Africa in December/January wore this old man out. Nevertheless - I've got some stories to tell, stories that I think will encourage you about the heart of our King, Jesus...and the reality of His Kingdom and His great and powerful redemptive love for people.

The first story has to do with me going to South Africa at all...what I was doing there...and my friend and translator, Pastor Aiken Zondo. There I stood, on December 27th, in Praetoria, before 1,500-2,000 of my South African brothers and sisters in Christ. Some were from Johannesburg and the surrounding area, some were from the Eastern Cape, some from Swaziland [a fascinating and also separate country in northeast South Africa], and many from Zululand along the southeastern coast. So what's the big deal...me teaching the Bible to some believers in another country? Not much...unless you consider the history of South Africa - and the demonic, racist system of division called apartheid, and the fact that the British and the Dutch imposed this system of hatred on the native South African population officially for 50 years - but unofficially for 200 years - and the fact that those folks who dominated and oppressed and kept separate and literally killed the bodies and spirits of millions happened to be white - and here I am, the only white guy in the house - whose face COULD remind the listeners of 200 years of pain...and yet, and yet - instead of rejection, I am met with love and warmth and embrace and respect and acceptance and a listening spirit. And I ask myself, "why?"

And then there is my translator, Aiken Zondo, my elder brother in the faith. Pastor Zondo has lost several children over the years - 2 to illness - but one of his sons got involved with the militant arm of the ANC [African National Congress]. Growing up, this son talked openly about his discouragement and frustration that only the whites had good schools, that only the whites had freedom to go and travel where they wished, that only the whites had access to good food and good places to live...and this intense young man didn't know what to do with his frustration. From what I hear of his story, he fought and fought the urge to channel his frustration into violence - but at some point, through a series of circumstances and some arm-twisting of the ANC - he helped them plant a bomb...some people were killed and injured...he got caught...and was executed for his crime by the ruling apartheid government. And here I am, with Pastor Zondo - this man who lost a son to a demonic system perpetrated, in this case, by white people - on a stage, preaching the Bible together, and we're hugging each other and functioning literally as one body and soul, sweating and shouting and crying together as we talk to our brothers and sisters about King Jesus and His Kingdom...and I say to myself, "When Pastor Zondo looks at me, Lord, what must he see? What must he be reminded of in terms of at least my 'appearance' and the 'appearance' of connection to the people who oppressed his land and his people and killed his son? Why would he want to be on a stage with me, teaching anything, let alone the Bible - and with such passion and conviction and obvious connection to my soul? Why?"

And even though I had been to South Africa several times before and even preached at this conference two other times in the last decade - still the question haunted me, "Why? There is no earthly reason why these folks or this man should want to have anything to do with me - if for no other reason, than because I remind them of a hateful, oppressive past - the painful, death-dealing effects of which are still lingering in South Africa today."

And then a couple days after the conference, I got an email from Pastor Zondo - and the email was only a paragraph or two long - and twice - not once, but twice - he said to me: "We know that you love us...we know that you love us...". And once again I was reminded - though I knew the answer already - from a theological perspective - I mean, I knew all the Bible verses and knew what the Gospel of Jesus calls us to and the power His love is supposed to have to draw all folks together - and how the power of this Kingdom love is supposed to declare to the world that indeed, the Kingdom of God has begun to decend in Jesus of Nazareth - and that indeed His cross has truly reconciled ALL people to the Father and to one another and a new era has dawned - and that our fractured lives have hope of being restored and the darkness has hope of being overcome by the light. I knew all the verses. I knew what was supposed to happen. But here, in front of my face, in the words of my still grieving brother, Pastor Zondo, I saw it - I saw the power of the Kingdom of God - that indeed, the love of Jesus, the Christ, had brought this white man from America together with my brothers and sisters in South Africa - and had reconciled even apparent differences and wounds - and had given us a bond that could never, ever be broken - because it was a bond won for us by the blood of the King Himself.

And I found myself, for the rest of the trip, and to this day - weeks later - kneeling in a deeper way than ever before in front of my King, and believing - more surely than ever - that this same love is THE only answer to every wound, every division, every fissure in every part of our personal and corporate lives, in every individual, every family, every community, every country on earth, every galaxy in the universe. And by God's grace, and the power of the Holy Spirit, I am going to keep being about that healing love until I no longer have any breath in my body to breathe. Help me, Lord Jesus.

Election insanity

2008-10-30T12:10:00.005-04:00

I don't want to say much...but I've got to say something about next week's election. First of all, of course we are privileged to live in the best human governing system in the world. Don't mistake anything I say for lack of gratitude for living in America. I've travelled the world - and indeed, it is sweet to live in the United States.

Second, of course the Scripture says something about our responsibility as believers in Jesus Christ toward our human government. We are commanded to pray for our leaders [I Timothy 2:1-4] We are commanded to submit to the governing authorities - at least until human law conflicts with God's law [Romans 13]. There are other Biblical allusions to our function as "good citizens" of the human kingdom surrounding us, but you get the point.

But probably the most radical statement concerning politics and human government in Scripture comes to us from the mouth of Jesus: "Render to Caesar the things that are Caesars, and to God the things that are God's." [Matt. 22:21] I'm not pretending to know everything that this pregnant statement means - but it doesn't take an interpretive wizard to get that Jesus is cautioning us about giving more attention to human governments, to earthly politics - to the kingdoms of this world...than we do to the ultimate Kingdom - the Kingdom of our God. Caesar gets something from us, but only a very limited "something". God gets ALL the rest.

Since we don't live in the 1st century, I'm not sure we can even begin to understand the radical nature of Jesus' words - and what these words called His 1st century followers to be about. Rome was the most powerful empire in the history of the ancient world. The Caesars - after Caesar Augustus - were worshipped as gods. Most of the 1st century Caesars had serious psychological issues - Augustus was an egomaniac, Caligula was a sociopathic narcissist, Claudius was paranoid enough to drive out all the Jews from Rome in 49 A.D., and Nero - even according to Roman historians - was absolutely nuts...evil nuts...to the point that he is suspected of burning Rome, blaming the Christians, and then crucifying them en masse [and lighting the streets of Rome with their burning crosses] for what they didn't do. These rulers - and the empire they ruled - were absolute in their power and authority. No one questioned them - to do so was certain death. [And we're afraid if McCain or Obama gets elected? Are you kidding me?] It is THESE Caesars and THIS Roman empire that Jesus says should ONLY get a small amount of attention, respect and focus...compared to what is given to the Kingdom of God.

In fact, what is remarkable to me in the NT documents is the absolute absence of any command for "good Christians" to be political activists in any sense of the term. The emphasis just isn't there. This doesn't mean that Jesus doesn't need His followers in government. Surely He places believers in every nook and cranny of society. For example, we know there were believers "in Caesar's household." [Phil. 4:22] It is absolutely noble - if it is our personal call in life - to be involved in human government or politics as a follower of Jesus. But human politics MUST NOT get more from us than its due.

So, if we're not called to be radical servants of the political process, then what are we called to be about? The call of the NT on ALL of us is to be rabid, surrendered, radical servants of Jesus of Nazareth, the King of another Kingdom. Our hope and trust is not to be in any earthly kingdom or any earthly king - but in King Jesus who will work through our foot-washing service to humanity to bring His Kingdom to the earth. "Thy Kingdom come, thy will be done - on earth as it is in heaven", Jesus prayed - and followers of Jesus pray over and over and over again, every day on our wounded planet. And there is nothing in this prayer - or Jesus' words elsewhere - or in any other New Testament document - about this Kingdom coming through an election of a certain human government, human president, human legislative body or the passing of any number of human propositions, referrendums and laws.

What am I saying? I'm calling followers of Jesus to stop the insanity. Whomever is elected next Tuesday - Jesus is still King of Kings and Lord of Lords. Pray, ask for wisdom and vote your conscience. But neither party nor either party's candidate is the "Jesus" candidate. And no matter who is elected - or what policies they bring to the table - our hope for our nation and our world continues to be in Jesus the King working through us to love our communities into His Kingdom! Stop worrying. Stop fretting. Stop giving Caesar more than his due. Stop hoping in human government to bring true and lasting righteousness. Start giving God what is His...our emotion, passion, intellect, actions - our very lives - to see His Kingdom come through Jesus Christ His King son.

Between 100 A.D. and 325 A.D. - when followers of Jesus had no money, no power, no influence to speak of, no buildings, no real structure, organization or business plan - and under the duress of several major Roman persecutions [Domitian, etc.] - the church grew from 10,000 to approximately 15-20 million. Their love, concern for the poor, willingness to stand up for those in need of justice and mercy, their sacrifice in the name of their Savior - in other words, the life of Jesus their King lived out through their humble lives - turned the powerful and absolutely unrighteous and evil Roman empire on its back.

What would it be like, today, if we took half of the emotional energy we put into human politics and worrying about the election and lobbying for one policy or candidate or party over another - and put that passion into following the real, naked, raw, radical Jesus as King and Lord into the daily routine of our lives?? What would happen if those in our corner of the world saw us loving ALL the one anothers - regardless of class or race or whether they were enemies or friends? What if we became known for standing against ALL unrighteousness with our bodies and lives, interracting personally and sacrifically with those who are in need of mercy and justice?? What if we as followers of Jesus became known for our wisdom?? Our compassion?? Our courage?? What if evil had to flee - NOT because we elected a certain candidate [which has NEVER worked to rid the world of evil] but because we lived out the authentic life of the King of Righteousness, Jesus of Nazareth, the Christ of God??

Stop the insanity. Follow Christ. He is the King. He is the answer. He is our only hope. He is the only peace. He is the only good. There is no one and nothing else.

Enough said.

He pursues each of us...as if there were only one of us

2008-09-30T09:24:00.006-04:00

Yesterday Gerald and Monique buried Gerald's auntie - Patrice. I wanted to be there at the church - True Vine [on Fenkel] - when the family arrived because I love Gerald and Monique and they are some of the sweetest friends and partners in Jesus that Carla and I have ever had. When they arrived, we hugged and kissed and exchanged the love of God. It was a good moment. The love of Jesus Christ heals and strengthens and comforts in the deepest pain.

But something happened a bit earlier that affected me even more deeply. Gerald's Aunt Patrice had lived a hard life. She was a believer in Jesus - but had struggled with addiction. During the pre-funeral visitation, a young woman came into the church and walked down front to pay her respects. By appearance, this young lady looked as if she had seen some rough times as well. On the way out, she had tears running down her face - and was so broken that she walked briskly by everyone - visitors and church members and...me. She talked quietly to herself, wiping away her tears and shaking her head...as she walked out the door and back down the street from where she had come...a street strewn with trash and garbage and earmarked by abandon buildings and weed-filled empty lots and a distinct absence of human beings.

I couldn't stand it. I couldn't. I followed her - and ended up running down the street, chasing her and eventually calling out, "Hey" - and she turned and stopped and I stood in front of her and simply said, "Are you alright?" I said, "What's your name?" And surprisingly, she told me: "Cassandra". I said, "You don't know me but I saw you crying and I had to come after you to simply tell you that I am so sorry for your loss...and that there is a God who loves you very, very much - in fact, with His whole heart." And I took her in my arms - in fact, she fell into my arms - and sobbed.

In a few moments, she paused and said, "Patrice was one of us and I loved her and am going to miss her so much." Then she said, "It could have been me", referring to Patrice's untimely, in fact tragic death. I said, "I know." Then I hugged her again and said, "That's why it is so important that you know that God's Son, Jesus, died for you and me and Patrice and everyone. Believe in Him, Cassandra. Believe in Him." And she sobbed some more.

Then the conversation was over. She asked me if there were any "obituaries"? I didn't know - but I said I would try to find one and save one for her if there were. And I said goodbye and she said thanks and she was gone.

I walked back to the church and I continued to think about Cassandra. I thought about God's great personal love for her...and for me...and how He pursues all of us in and through our pain. And how He never stops loving us and never stops pursuing us...ever.

As I stood in the lobby of the church, Gerald came and told me the family had put me on the program for "remarks" - and I said to my friend, "Gerald, I've got something else I think I need to do." And he said, "Go do it" and I went and stood in line and waited for a program - the obituary that Cassandra had asked for - and got one of the last ones - maybe the last one in the house. And then I started walking down Fenkel, looking for Cassandra. I walked and I walked and I walked and then I turned around and started to walk back and prayed and told the Lord that I tried and to please, please take care of this lamb - and then she was there, across the street, walking toward me. And I told her I had been looking for her and gave her the obituary - and she thanked me and hugged me and I told her again how much her Heavenly Father loved and adored her. I said, "Don't forget, Cassandra." She promised me she wouldn't. And then, for the second time that morning, she was gone.

It's personal, man...it's personal

2008-08-19T15:40:00.013-04:00

You know what is blowing me away...again...this week? In fact, it has been weighing in on my spirit the last 10 days or so - ever since Caroline [our youngest] asked me to preach on what it really means to follow Christ. This is it - this whole Jesus thing is absolutely personal. I've known that. Of course I've known that. I suspect you have known that. But I feel like I'm getting to know it the last couple weeks in a deeper, more desperately personal way.

Last week, in preparation for the "Caroline sermon", I did a word study on the Greek word for "disciple" [mathetes]. Actually I read the article on "mathetes" in the Theological Dictionary of the New Testament - and I was astounded to read once again [I've read the article before - but this part didn't really click in] that following Jesus was unique in the ancient world - because it was so personal. The Greeks had the concept. Their philosophers had "disciples" - but the connection between "master" and "pupil" was around ideology. Jewish culture also had its version of the concept - but again, the connection between rabbi and follower was "content" - the Torah. But with Jesus the connection was personal. Sure, He taught like no other - He communicated the Kingdom of God with power in His parables and sermons and personal dialogue - but when someone decided to become His follower - the content of Jesus' message seemed to be secondary. It isn't that His message or His Word wasn't important. Of course it was important. But clearly what was MORE important was the personal connection His followers had with Him. His message was important not only because it was truth - but primarily because it came out of HIS mouth. His followers embraced the Sermon on the Mount mostly because they embraced Him!!

Think about it - Jesus told His followers He loved them. [John 15:9] He called them His "friends". [15:15] He told them He was going away but would come again because He wanted to take them to be "with Himself." [14:1-3] He said that in the meanwhile He would "not leave them orphans but would come to them and be in them". [14:18] He even said that if anyone would keep His Word - it would primarily be because "they love Me." [14:23]

Then, the next generation of Jesus' followers - Paul, for example - are ALL about the personal. Take Galatians 2:20 where Paul says, "I am crucified with Christ, nevertheless I live - yet not I, but Christ lives in me!" No Jewish rabbi [not one of the prophets, even Moses!] or any Greek philosopher would ever claim to have that kind of personal connection or personal power over a follower - let alone claim to "live in" a follower. In Colossians Paul talks about "Christ in you, the hope of glory" [2:27] and "Christ who is our life" [3:4] - this is the most mystically intimate language concerning masters and disciples in the ancient world. For Paul, it was first about his intimate relationship with the God-man, Jesus...and of course, THEN about the Word that came out of His mouth. It was the same for Peter, who talks about "Jesus Christ, whom having not seen, you love..." - and John who said of Jesus, "By this we know love, because He laid down His life for us...". I'm telling you - in a new way this week I'm seeing it - it's personal. It is deeply, profoundly personal.

And this is what occurs to me - maybe some of my struggle [and maybe some of yours] with following Jesus has been, at times, because I have made it a little too much about "the content" - and in the process, neglected Him. It is so easy as a Westerner, as a guy who loves to study, grow and learn - to make it all about the Bible - ALMOST as an end in itself - instead of the Bible being a Book that is given to us to lead us to Jesus. Even Jesus Himself told the Pharisees [John 5:39-40] and the two guys on the Road to Emmaus, "Hey, the Scriptures are all about Me." [Luke 24:27] Maybe my daily journey as a believer has at times been about "mastering the content" or "perfecting certain behavior patterns" or "obeying the rules" or almost anything BUT personal intimacy with Jesus - which is the primary characteristic of being His disciple. Maybe that is why at times I lose joy or peace or fulfillment. Maybe the doctrines and behaviors and practices - as important and helpful as they are - maybe they were never meant to fulfill me. Maybe the Psalmist had it right when He said - about the Father - but I suspect, prophetically also about the Son, "In Him is fullness of joy" [16:11] and "My soul waits for the Lord...for my heart shall rejoice in Him" [33:20-21].

One thing I know - even as I write these words, I can feel my spirit taking off - I really love Him so very much. I've got baggage and issues and I have bad days and occasionally struggle with this and that - but the constant in my life is Him. I can't imagine getting up in the morning and thinking, "Wow, I'm excited about the Christian life. I've got 27 major commands I'm working on today and 34 lesser commands - and of course there are 3 doctrines I want to master and 4 new Hebrew words I want to study...". But I about go nuts with anticipation when I think that my Savior Jesus is waiting for me in each new day, to walk beside me, to guide me and lead me - often into enemy territory - to use me, to launch me, to challenge me, to shape me...but the point is, whatever He has for me - we'll be in it together!! And His Words, His commands, His character and behavior - all of that will be downloaded into my spiritual DNA, into my life as I continue to hang out with and do life with Him.

I encourage you today - whatever else your faith is about for you, whatever struggles or tensions or issues you are facing - know this: Jesus Christ loves you...personally...with an everlasting love. He's waiting for you right now...believe in Him, then follow Him by walking with Him, talking with Him, listening to Him, spending time in His Word to you...in other words, do life in relationship with Him...because it really, really is personal.

Daughters of God

2008-06-25T09:53:00.002-04:00

Last blog I talked about males...our need for fathers...our need to grow ourselves up into more than just little boys in men's bodies - but into true men, men who use our strength in good ways, who use our gift of courage to step into the darkness of evil for the sake of justice, mercy and righteousness, who connect intimately and appropriately with our sisters, God's daughters, in order to have dominion over the earth.

In the last month, it is these daughters of God who have been on my mind. Maybe it is partly because of tutoring - where we have over 10 little sisters who come regularly to hang out and learn...what is it that when I walk in the door of our Jefferson Room, what is it that causes three or four of these young ladies to come screaming across the floor, to leap up on me, to grab me around the neck, to hold on to my arms, to hug me and to basically not want to let me go? One of these dear little sisters of Jesus comes to church every week and holds my hand and sits close during worship and you can sense that her feminine heart is looking, longing for the masculine soul of a father.

Maybe it is partly because of the young adolescent females I see strolling daily in front of our church...many times naively dressed in ways that if they knew what guys were thinking - they wouldn't dress in those ways anymore...and listening to the often disrespectful comments from the young men and wondering where the dads are to stand in front of their daughters and look at the guys saying, "This is my daughter. You can't talk about her like that. If you persist, you will need to answer to me."

Maybe it is partly because of the young women in university Christian campus groups from around the country that I am privileged to speak to about Jesus - and then connect with over coffee or in a small group - who begin to open up to me with stories of hurt and fear and insecurity...with an intensity that suggests they are speaking these words and feelings to a safe, older brother for the very first time. Some of the older sisters tell me they long to be married, long to be connected to a good man who is safe and respectful and courageous and walks with God and has eyes to see their true beauty - and they ask me with hurting hearts, "Kevin, where are the real men?"

Perhaps it is partly because this summer I am watching Caroline, the last of my three little girls go off to college ten hours east - while my middle daughter Leigh Anne travels two days drive out west to enter graduate school...and I am wondering in my spirit - "Will there be good men, safe men, to be there for them, in partnership, in relationship...to talk with, to share with, to do life with...to carry out God's design for His children having dominion over the earth?" Will there be a man, or men - as a brother or brothers...possibly at some point as a husband...to take over for me, a strong man who has loved his daughters, who would die for his daughters in the name of Jesus Christ?

I can't answer that question. I can only continue to get my arms around as many young men as God gives me time and grace and direction - and ask my Father to help me pour the strong love and character of Jesus into their spirits - so that there will be a next generation of the sons of God to stand alongside the daughters of God - to do battle on our planet for the souls of men and women who hang in the balance.

In the meanwhile, I want to say to the daughters of God - young and old - know that you are His precious little girl. Know it. You are created fully in His image. He loves you with all of His heart. He gave you to men because it "was not good for a man to be alone." You have a great gift from the Father for bringing deep relationship to the earth...to men...to families...to the church...to corporations...to the neighborhood...to the brokenness of our planet. And know that He has given each of you another precious gift - He has imprinted you with His beauty. You don't need to become beautiful. You ARE beautiful. God says that it is so. Don't doubt it. Hear Him whispering to you this day - in all of your uniqueness - "You are my beautiful daughter. I made your shoulders, gave you your nose, your hair, your eyes...KNOW that you are beautiful in My sight - and use your gift to invite the world - especially my sons - into intimate relationship with you, with me, and with one another...for the sake of my Kingdom."

I pray, dear sisters, that God will give you good men, good fathers, good brothers, good husbands to partner with for the sake of Jesus Christ. But in the meanwhile, don't wait. Don't wait. The world can't afford for you to wait. Go out and be the strong and beautiful and relationally gifted daughters of God that you are. Bring your passion and compassion and strong hearts for relationship to the table in every situation in which God places you...bringing His healing to the brokenness in our world.

Where are the MEN?

2008-05-19T14:00:00.003-04:00

This is my first blog. I hope that something I say encourages or challenges you in some way. One thing I can promise – I will write when I think I have something to say. So some weeks, I may blog twice a day. Other weeks, there may be nothing. Today, there is something on my mind…about men. Not males. Men - real men, responsible men, relational men, strong men, loving men. Question: where are they?

Saturday we had 11 folks in our living room for a “new members’ class”. At the end of the day we each drew a genogram – a diagram of our family of origin and how adults in our lives had impacted us both positively and negatively. 9 of the 11 people in the room then shared openly. All 9 had a horror story about a significant older male – mostly fathers – in their lives. The dads were either absent or abusive or overbearing or neglectful or emotionally distant or irresponsible in some way. In every case, the immature behavior of these significant males was devastating.

Then on Wednesday, Pete, Gerald, Larry and I met with our crew of young people from our neighborhood – to talk about jobs and life. I did a devotional about the significance of our fathers. I asked how many of them – about 12 were sitting around the table in the Jefferson Room - had absent fathers. The answer: all of them. The impact? Once again – devastating.
There is something about a strong, compassionate, truth-telling, clean and sober, respectful, emotionally present, responsible, communicative father – in the home and the community – that NOTHING else can totally replace. As the father goes, so goes the home. As the father goes, so goes the church. As the father goes, so goes the community. As the father goes, so goes the culture. I can’t totally explain it. But it’s true.

One of the devastating effects of the absence of true men – is that young males grow up not knowing how to be a real man. So they spend their youth trying to figure out what to do with their strength, their attraction to women, their thirst for adventure, their desire to climb mountains and conquer new worlds…and often end up abusing these God-given desires and passions.
Our communities end up filled with babies and “baby mommas” – but no dads – because there aren’t any mature men who model celibacy before marriage and respect and commitment and covenant keeping. And boys who aren’t taught by older, real men that they have the gift of strength for one main reason - to defend those in need of justice – end up being the perpetrators of violence that make those same babies and baby mommas afraid to walk the streets. And when boys grow up to be men who abuse the gift of adventure – they create and succeed and then feed their own egos and bank accounts – it is often because there are no dads or uncles or men to show that real manhood is about achieving in order to give back to those who have less. Wall Street has plenty of succe ssful males making it big even in a down economy. What Wall Street lacks is enough real men who take their God-given profit and channel it toward those around the world in need of compassion and mercy.

So what do we do? First, guys, we can grow ourselves up into real men. We can make sure that we aren’t just little boys in men’s bodies neglecting to be the men in our own families, relationships and neighborhoods. Ask the folks around you – especially your wives and kids – how they see you using…or abusing…your gifts of strength, courage, adventure and passion. Then do what you gotta do to begin or further the journey of growing yourself up.

But there’s one more thing we can do – ask God to show you some young men who don’t have fathers that you can get your arms around and begin to journey with…to care about them, to love them, to show them along the way what it means to be a real man. I can tell you a place to start – Wednesday afternoons at 4:00 p.m. in the Jefferson Room. I’d love to introduce you to some great guys…some great, great guys…who really want to be men, but aren’t really sure how…and aren’t sure where to turn to find the answer.